Will He Ever Learn?

Jeff had been dealing with a sore throat for over a month now, but he didn't think anything of it. He'd been doing a lot of interviews lately and more appearances than normal, but today a dull ache was settling in his right side. It didn't bother him at first, but now his temperature had spiked unbearably high. Anyone cold tell what was wrong with him by now, if he'd let them............

Chris had felt off all day long, he couldn't really define what it was, but something in his heart told him something was very wrong. When he got home and saw Jeff limping down the stairs, alarm bells immediately began to ring in his head, knowing Jeff....

"Hey Jeffro..." Chris smiled when his lover stopped to stare at him "You feeling okay? You're limping."

Jeff simply nodded. He didn't want to risk Chris knowing how hoarse he was, and it was honestly too painful to speak.

Chris wasn't surprised that Jeff didn't answer him, it was a tactic he'd resorted to many times before, that and his unnaturally pale skin belied his true condition

"Jeffro...." He gently took Jeff's hand and looked him in the eyes "Please tell me what's wrong, the last time you hid an illness from me I nearly lost you. Come on darlin', please let me in."

Jeff pulled away and limped toward the kitchen. He couldn't let Chris no how sick he was.

"Jeff...." Chris rolled his eyes and followed his stubborn boyfriend "I know there's something wrong, no one limps for nothing." When Jeff didn't answer Chris resorted to plan B "Jeff, do you want me to call Matt?"

Jeff shot a death glare in Chris' direction. The last person he wanted to deal with right now was his brother.

Chris got his cell phone out and prepped the speed dial "I'm not bluffing Jeff" he held out the phone so Jeff could see Matt's number, and he held his thumb over the CALL button "Should I call him?"

"Don't," Jeff kept his voice at a whisper, hoping it would hide how hoarse he sounded.

Chris shut the phone off and walked up to Jeff "Then let me help you sweetheart" he gently rubbed the younger man's cheek and mentally winced when he felt how warm Jeff was "You're sick baby..." he whispered softly "Please...please Jeff, let me help you."

"You can help me by leaving me alone," Jeff muttered, inwardly cursing how much pain he'd just caused himself.

Chris felt like he'd just been kicked in the stomach "Why Jeffery..." he stepped back and slowly shook his head "Why won't you let me help you?"

"I just......wanna be left....alone," Jeff said, he was struggling now to force out his words.

Chris knew what was coming and steeled himself for the inevitable "You didn't answer my question" he murmured "Why do you shut me out like this? I love you Jeff, I'm supposed to take care of you when you get sick."

"Don't you get......tired of taking care.......of....me?" Jeff asked.

"Never sweetheart" Chris saw Jeff beginning to sway and took him gently into his arms "I'll take care of you every day of my life if necessary."

Jeff shook his head. "Not this time," Jeff said.

Chris groaned "And why not?" he murmured "Honey you can't even stand on your own, don't you trust me to help you?"

"I can't......let......you help....me," there was a fearful undertone in Jeff's voice as he spoke.

"Why?" Chris whispered "Just tell me why you're doing this to me!"

Jeff shook his head, staring down at the floor in shame.

"Baby?" Chris leaned close and gently stroked Jeff's cheek "Sweetheart...talk to me....what's going on?"

"I don't...wanna talk.....about it," Jeff muttered, by this time his throat was screaming back in pain every time he spoke.

"Sweetheart PLEASE, I'm begging you..." Chris was starting to cry "Don't do this to me....don't you love me?"

Jeff had gotten to the point that he couldn't put himself through the pain of speech anymore. He reached for his notebok on the table and scribbled down his answer.

Of course I do